When we are fully energised, nurture ourselves and look after our well-being, we fill our energetic cup. It is only then that we are well positioned to support others without depleting our own energy sources. While it is sometimes necessary to draw on our reserves to help others in times of real need, continually drawing on our own reserves will lead to exhaustion, fatigue and stress.
Habitually drawing on adrenaline and caffeine to make it through the day erodes our energetic reserves. These help us to push our bodies to perform when rest, and a break from stressors, is what is truly needed. In clinic, identifying this often raises a conundrum: how can we get everything done without pushing ourselves to, or beyond, our energetic limits? And what will people think of us if we say ‘no’ or delegate tasks?
First of all, consider the cost of persisting when our own energetic cup is half-full. When we put others first consistently, at the detriment of our own well-being, our body will begin to object. It may raise symptoms such as headaches, neck tension, back pain, etc. This is an attempt to alert us to the fact we are not looking after ourselves. If we leave it long enough, these symptoms have the potential to manifest into illness. Recurring colds, for example, are a typical symptom of overwhelm.
We enjoy being of service but no-one enjoys being a servant.
Let’s be clear. There are times when there is a real need to help others. And there are other times when we do for others what they could and should be doing for themselves. When we do for others when they should be doing for themselves, we in effect rob them from experience. These experiences, even negative experiences, help them to learn and grow.
Is it selfish?
One of the regular objections to looking after ourselves is that we are being ‘selfish’. If we ignore our needs long enough because we are focused on doing for others we may become ill and need looking after. It is the body’s way of slowing us down. Now, however, we need someone to look after us. So which is more ‘selfish’?
Trapped by past patterns.
Like the fear of being seen as selfish, there can be many other patterns at play that keep us trapped in the cycle of helping others to the detriment of our own health. Some of these include guilt, over-protection, a way to support our poor self-esteem and so on.
The cost of minding other’s business.
Further, while we may feel we are being helpful, our misplaced efforts can be detrimental. To learn, grow and look after ‘our business’ is a fundamental human need that brings pride in satisfaction in who we are and what we are capable of. Sometimes our journey becomes difficult, yet if others help us to protect us from difficulty, how will we learn that we actually have the inner-resources to deal with life’s trials?
If this resonates, and you can see reasons why you shouldn’t prioritise your well-being, consider making an appointment today. Kinesiology has the power to re-write patterns that no longer serve and to help you create the life you want to lead.
How are you nurturing your mind, body and spirit?