Why you need to Love and Accept Yourself

I have been giving this a lot of thought lately.

We need to take care of ourselves.

This is our job and our responsibility.

This is self love.

I love you written in sand
Self love is not selfish.

When we think about what love looks like we tend to associate ideas such as strong feelings of affection, respect, support, kindness, forgiveness, compassion, security, protectiveness, and warmth.

Imagine being able to give these gifts to yourself!

Our relationship with another should never come above our own inner happiness.

To live our highest life, we need peace and stability from a strong connection with our inner self. When we have a strong inner relationship we don’t need someone else to give us love, acceptance and validation. The truth is, the quality of our relationship with our self determines the quality of our relationships with others. For example, if we don’t believe we are worthy or deserving of our own love we will attract someone who also believes we are not worthy or deserving.

When we take care of our emotional needs correctly with self-love, we strengthen our vibration and raise our energy. Many studies have shown a better relationship with our self can contribute to improved self-esteem, protection from depression, stronger immunity, and better mental and physical health.

Love breeds love
Love breeds love...and good health.

So why then do so many people struggle to even say ‘I love and accept myself’?

We aren’t born questioning ourselves about whether we should love our self, whether we deserve our love and acceptance. If you aren’t sure about this statement, observe a small child at play - trusting, curious, loving, innocent… The perspectives we adopt are given to us through our experiences and interactions with others.

Would you speak to your best friend the way you speak to yourself?

If the answer is no, why not? How did it become okay to criticise, nit-pick and judge yourself? The voice we use to speak to our self is part of our ego which self reflects, supports or condemns our thoughts, feelings and actions. If you have an understanding of meditation, you will already have learnt that this part of our self is not the ‘true’ us. The Exchange episode, "Increasing Brain Potential" with Dr Sarah McKay (neuroscientist) and Tansel Ali, confirms brain plasticity and the human growth mindset. This supports the tone and content this voice uses can be changed, much the same as a limiting belief. And it needs to be kind!

Criticism can affect our health.

Self-criticism, taking on others’ criticism or being self-deprecating weakens our life force energy. Bones and muscles deteriorate under the weight of criticism and negativity. Placing ‘energetic knives’ into ourselves limits us and holds us back from being empowered. Our choice to continue with self-criticism can also lead to depression, nervous system disorder, heart attack, haemorrhoids, and liver problems in the long term.

Humans make mistakes.

We need mistakes to grow and criticism inhibits that growth. The further we are from self-love the deeper we are buried in illusion and fear, and the greater the capacity for mistakes or cruel errors of judgement.

Not sure?

Consider why we inflict pain on others. Finding fault with others lessens our attention on our own faults (we think) and seeking to hurt others before they hurt us is an act of self-protection driven by fear. There are many more examples and each points to the way we outwardly reflect how we treat ourselves.

“The world is a mirror, forever reflecting what you are doing within yourself.”

Neville Goddard

Making mistakes is part of the human condition. Every step of the way, we have an opportunity to appreciate the experience and take the lesson. If we haven’t figured out a recurring mistake it is because we are not ready to understand the lesson as yet. The universe is forgiving – it will continue to bring the same problem in many shapes until we are ready to figure out the lesson.

Everything happens in the right time and place.

If we are simply learning from our mistakes in this wonderful journey called life, what is there to criticise ourselves about? The more we heal ourselves with self-love, the less we hurt ourselves and others.

More (Self) Love

Simple suggestions to grow the love…

  • Consider what you would suggest to your best friend if they had a similar experience/problem. Listen to your advice.

  • Parent yourself as if you were your modern parent. Punishment is out – logic and consequences are in. Assess what went wrong. Choose how best to deal with a similar situation next time. Repair if needed. Learn and let it go.

  • Use a kind tone of voice when speaking to yourself.

  • Stop using derogatory or negative words. You are not stupid. You are learning and growing. Negative words contain negative energy and attract negative experiences which eventually impact health.

  • Be patient. Remind yourself you are learning and growing in the right time.

  • Let it go. Staying focused on a past experience robs you of present experiences.

  • Notice negativity, gently correct yourself with the reminder that you are doing the best you can in this moment.

  • Gratitude – give thanks for the journey.

  • Breathe

Start the day with gratitude - lakeside kinesiology
Start the day with gratitude.

We are all on a journey.

Sometimes we progress more easily than others. If you have made the choice to improve your life through loving and accepting yourself and are finding 'rewiring' your thoughts challenging, consider kinesiology. Make an appointment today.

Live your best life.


#selflove #lakesidekinesiology #mindbodysoul

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